Fourth night

My 13yo has been mouthing off about how we won't be getting him what he really wants, so we should just save our money and get him nothing at all - same garbage I hear every year. He complains while opening his presents that they aren't that great, even when he loves them (we know he loves them, because he has this dimple...).

So, this year, I decided to just light my menorah by myself. He didn't even notice the first night. The second night he looked at it, and asked, "Don't I get any presents?" I told him that he didn't seem to care about having presents, so I saved myself the trouble. He replied, "I care about presents! I want ALL my presents!" I apologized and gave him some gelt, and he pouted and walked off. Third night (last night), I asked him if he wanted to light the candles with me, and the first thing out of his mouth is, "Do I get a present?" I asked him if he only wanted to light candles if he got a present. He said that no, he did want to light candles regardless, he just wanted to know if he would be getting a present. He zipped downstairs to light candles without waiting for an answer, and saw that there were presents! My custom is to set out all the Hanukkah presents at once, and let them pick which one they want to open each night. So, after we lit the candles, he picked the smallest, least interesting present, which was a silly little book, not anything he had asked for, and after he opened it he gushed about how it was just what he wanted.

Kids. I admit, he probably learned to be a mouthy little brat from his mother, but seriously, he kills me.